Woo hoo!!! I'm officially out of my funk! Even after the TNT kick off it took awhile to get firing on all cylanders. So what finally jump started me? A lousy night's sleep. How the hell does a lousy night's sleep finally give me the kick in the ass I needed? I've had a lot of lousy nights of sleep. Ambien and Lunesta have not done squat for me. That's because they can't take the edge off my rambling thoughts. I'm rambling now as I try to write this, so let me try to get focused on the point I was trying to make.
I woke on Wednesday Jan 31st, dog tired from no sleep. I realized that probably the biggest problem causing my total lack of energy and restless sleeping was that my diet sucked. I'm not talking about eating too much. (That's the other part of the story!) I'm talking about the total lack of fruits and vegetables in my diet. I admit it, I'm lazy when it comes to food prep. It's far easier for me to throw a few slices of turkey on bread then make a salad and throw the turkey on top of that. I might grab an apple or banana if I have any in the house, but God forbid I wash and cut up strawberries to have those!
My other problem with vegetables is I don't like many of them. So when I read how one can make a really filling salad by adding mushrooms, tomatoes, cucumber, onion, carrots, beans to the lettuce I'm stuck. The only thing I like in that list is carrot. The same thing happens when I read the ingredients for a healthy and filling vegetable soup. I think I can name the veggies I like on one hand. Carrots, broccoli, green beans, lettuce, spinach, corn, and lima beans. The last two go on the other hand because are rather starchy so I rank them with potatoes which I love. Especially fried. :-) So how many things can I do with 5 vegetables?
I like a few more fruits. Apples, peaches, strawberries, blueberries, rasberries, oranges, grapefruit, pineapple, kiwi, grapes, banana. I'm starting to get used to melons and cantalopes, but not ready to bring those home yet.
Do you get the feeling that I was a finicky eater as a kid? My father grew tomatoes in our back yard, yet all the cajoling, bribes, threats, etc did not change my opinion of tomatoes. I never liked the slimy stuff coming out of the middle, and the taste didn't do much for me. Texture and consistancy has always played a part in my food choices. Slimy things don't do it for me. The funny thing is I like tomato soup, and spagetti sauce. However there better not be tomato chunks in there. I've been known to take a jar of spagetti sauce with tomato chunks and run it through the blender to eliminate the chunks.
Not only have I not been eating enough of the good stuff, but I've been eating way too much starch, fat, protein, and sugar. Since I returned from Honolulu in 2005, I've gained 20 pounds. I can't be too hard on myself especially considering the hell I went through in 2006. Broken ribs and sudden loss of one's dad tends to mess with one's mind and body. Not to mention mid-life crisis, and raging menapausal hormones. Did anyone ever tell you menapause sucks!? Well it does.
Friday February 2nd I went back to Weight Watchers for the first time in a couple of years. Weighing in at a 152. That's not as bad as the 167 I weighed after mom died. Weight Watchers works for me as long as I attend meetings, journal my food choices, and track my points. When I decide I can do it on my own, the wheels start to fall off. Maybe after I lose the weight I'm going to have really concentrate on keeping a food journal attending meetings more often. In some ways I'm like an alcoholic with food. There is Overeaters Anonymous, so maybe like the OA, and AA members who attend meetings year in and year out I may have to do the same.
So how's it been going so far? Pretty good. I've been bringing home fruit, washing and cutting it up immediately and keeping it in the fridge, ready to grab immediately. When I do that, I eat it. It's back to munching on baby carrots in lieu of crackers and pretzels. I'm making and eating salads at lunch or dinner. The other important thing I'm doing is I'm not be sucked into copying my husband's behaviors. In December and January I had a tendancy to do what he was doing. So if he had 3 glasses of wine during dinner and afterwards, I would do the same thing. If he ate a whole candy bar instead of splitting it with me, I'd do likewise. Now I just ignore what he's doing. I'll drink my 4 oz of wine and take my 2 points. He wants a whole candy bar, fine I'll eat a couple of my Dove Promises. At one point per chocolate I can enjoy 2 or 3 and not feel like a pig. I get my chocolate fix at not great expense.
I'm slowly trying to make myself back into a triathlete. Biking is hard at this time of year, but I have started to add more running intervals into my walks. Yestrday I got into the pool for the first time since last year. I actually cleaned up the windtrainer bike, and mounted it back on the unit. Now I just need to get back on it.
BTW, I've also lost 3 pounds so far. It's going to take time to fit into my clothes again, but I'm on the right track. I just need to not totally lose it after I have French food tonight for Valentine's Day. At least my dear husband has the common sense not to give me a box of chocolates.