Sometimes I make myself nuts. I go from super motivated and gung ho tri-geek to I don't give a shit about anything. Right now I'm in one of those I don't give a shit funks. I have two more races coming up in the next 3 1/2 weeks, and I'm not real excited. I should be excited at least about going to Hawaii for the ITU Age Group World Chammpionships, but perhaps I still feel like I backed in there with USAT's solution to the Kansas City fiasco. Perhaps there are some doubts about whether I'll be able to be an official member of Team USA by placing high enough, or whether I'm going to be another poser.
My running sucks, and I just can't motivate myself to go out and run. I wasted all day Wesdnesday when the weather was nice. Thursday I wasted time again but I finally put on my running clothes on and it started raining again. Yesterday's blog was because I was in big time procrastinating mode. I did finally pull myself away from the blog, and ran for 40 minutes. It was nothing spectacular, but I did make myself run some hills. I miss having Jeannie around. Even though I'd run ahead of her, and loop back at least it was scheduled time on the road. I need a new weekday running partner.
I think my biggest problem is I'm addicted to working out with other people. I love my group rides, and when Mother nature rains on my parade I'm not so inclined to do something on my own. Tuesday was a wash out ride wise because I had to do my civic duty. At least I had my Team in Training group swim and run in the evening to get my sorry ass out of the house.
Chocolate Binges and Sleep:
So what did I do today? I downloaded the Hawaii course for the compu-trainer. I had great intentions of actually doing it, but it didn't work. My husband stayed home today and we went out for lunch. So much for going to the pool for a swim. After lunch I had gotten into the dark chocolate M&Ms. They're a Star Wars themed package called Darth Mix. The motto is "Come over to the Dark Side". When it comes to chocolate it doesn't take much to get me to the Dark Side. These things are truly evil! I can't just eat a handful of M&Ms, so I ate the entire package. (King Size no less!) I've been on a two month long chocolate binge! Argh!!!
There have been studies lately that tie in poor sleep to obesity. I believe it. My sleep has become totally FUBARed. (F#%ked up beyond all recognition.) It's a combination of stress and the hot flashes from hell. Sometimes I think I'm lucky if I manage to fall asleep within an hour and stay asleep for 3 hours. Who knows how much sleep I'm actually getting, but I'm not convinced how much longer I can function like this. I think the lack of sleep is contributing to my chocolate cravings and assorted munchie attacks I have during the day. I'm sure if I wasn't getting exercise I'd gain disgusting amounts of weight.
Pissing Matches on trinewbies.com forums:
I'm a member of several different triathlon message boards. I post on trinewbies, beginnertriathlete, and slowtwitch. The order that I've listed them also is the order of frequency in which I post. Slowtwitch is the hardcore tri-snobs board. Beginnertriathlete is the "touchy, feely rah, rah" board. Trinewbies falls in between the two extremes though at times it seems to have gone away from the newbieness and more towards the hardcore tri-geek. I like all 3 sites, but certain individuals that frequent both trinewbies and slowtwitch drive me crazy.
One thing I do on both trinewbies (TNO) and beginnertriathlete (BT) is post race reports in their race reports forums. It comes naturally to me since for years I've kept very detailed race journals. These forums have become sort of an online race journal for me. Sometimes I'm afraid I ramble on too much, but I like noting the little details that make the race memorable for me. I usually get a few encouraging responses from various forum members congratulating me on placing in my age group. I've had a very good season. Seven triathlons with nothing lower then 3rd place in my age group. I know that streak would have been broken in Kansas City if Mother Nature had not intervened. I'm a realist. If the streak doesn't end in Rye next weekend, it certainly will end in Hawaii. I can live with that.
What makes me crazy is the sarcastic responses I get from one guy from Northern California. He's much faster then me, but he's also younger then me. It seems to totally irk the hell out of him that I can place in my AG with Olympic times in the 2:40-2:45 range. In his age group 2:15 doesn't get him squat. Can I help it if I'm a 51 year old female from the Northeast whereas he's a 40 something male from California? Cna I help it if guys seem to peak in their forties and that those age groups tend to be the biggest ones?
In my latest race report from the Madison Triathlon I had put down my overall placing along with my age group placing in the various sports. He couldn't wait to jump on what I had posted in the slowtwitch forum regarding my opinion being FOP, MOP, BOP in the various disciplines. I answered the question in comparision to other women in my age group though it may not have been clear from my answers. Damn he had a field day with that. We exchanged barbs back and forth about what I had written. All of these exchanges went back and forth on TNO even though my comments that evoked his sarcastic replies came from a completely different forum. I was gratified by the people who had PM'ed me to tell me I didn't need to justify my results for him.
I'm comfortable with who I am, and I'm proud of what I've accomplished despite my sucky running. I'll just keep posting, and not be chased off by idiots like that. Unfortunately some are not so thick skinned, and do get chased off. We had one woman who was frequent contributer on the boards. She's very overweight but is tackling the problem by working on her nutrition, and by getting into triathlons. She's done some super sprints, and shared her race reports, but a few people belittled her efforts. She writes from her heart, and I must say she has given me lots of food for thought in terms of how I look at other people. I hate seeing people like that get chased off, but at least she has a good live support system.